In an act of enormous bravery, Rupert Quaintance visited Christ Church Hampstead and Christ Church Primary School, photographed himself there, then turned tail and fled.
And the kicker? He did all of this last week, but posted photos today in an effort to stir up maximum panic and distress amongst the parents and children of Hampstead.
In this shot, he claims to be enacting a “moment of acute defiance”. Pity he looks terrified.
One of his friends enquires as to whether he has a knife, and Rupert hints that he does:
And then, just to prove his point that he “occupied” Hampstead space, he posts a couple more shots:And this is where he gives the entire show away.
You see, as anyone who actually lives in Hampstead will tell you, it rained all day today, with only a few breaks; the ground was wet, and certainly the dry leaves along Christ Church Passage were sodden and damp.
Yet somehow, the sun came out for Rupert? Unlikely.
Nevertheless, the police were alerted, and are taking Rupert’s implied threats very seriously indeed, as well they ought.
Rupert is now claiming that he is no longer in the UK, though like anything he says, this should be taken with several pinches of salt:
If Rupert has indeed left the country (and we have our doubts), he’s likely bolted over to Ireland for one last snogfest with Angie before they reappear to attend the child abuse rally that’s scheduled to take place on 17 September outside Westminster.
UPDATE: Rupert has not left the UK; as of about 6 p.m. he is at an address in Erith, participating in a video interview with Angela Power-Disney.
We hope they’ll be met by an appropriately enthusiastic welcoming committee.