Fruitcake Quotes

The following malapropisms were all uttered/written by our distinguished counterparts over the Hoaxtead fence.

So put aside your indifferences, grab a cuppa and enjoy these gems of wordsmithery…

“The emperor’s got no clothes”

“Impolitically correct”

“You’ve worked your fingernails to the bone”

“The police were so futile to themselves”

“Our intentions are ignoble”

“Those who despitefully use you”

“He speaks with folk tongue”

“I can’t work with this level of idiocity”

“Don’t throw unnecessary allegories our way”

“Swaps don’t drain themselves”

“To horn in on what’s worth pursuing”

“I will not be putting Arthur on a pedalstool”

“My grandkids are auctioning today for roles in a movie”

“I relish you have concerns”

“Dilutions of grandeur”

“The word for the day is militant ignorance”

“So as David Livingstone I think it was said, I am going into the jungle – I may be some time”

“Your atrocious murder of the English language indicates you might have went to school in the US”

“You shout learn how to spell”

“We need to put aside our indifferences”


“Dicky Rearman will slip up one day and get his just deserves.”


“I know it’s a mute point…”

“I’m not even gonna mention their website, coz I really don’t wanna give them any more intention than they have.”

“Contact the Law Society if you had hair frolic tests carried out by this company”

“The harsh treatment metered out”

“From my up and coming film”

“We were at the Royal Court’s Injustice yesterday.”

“We are using high profile cases to set a president”

“I am supported by Amomynous”


“That’s a rhetorical question and the answer is yes”

“You’re morons. Period. You’re morons”

“I’m going to be lended some money”

“You’ve got a 98% of dying”

“Smooth FM is sponsored by Cancer Reshirt”

“They had to give her antibotics”

“It was catastrotic”

“They had to aminister it”

“You can’t harry love”

“Imagine if we all got together and conjugated outside the council building”

“We need to shove all those stick bastards back through our tunnel”

“God is our crater.”

“The USA has at least an ongoing investigation and arrests with this Pizzagate sandal”

“I’ve been pursing the fat cats”

“This problem is around the World. It’s endemic”

“He’s banning together with other ex-police officers”

“She has courage up the kazoo”

“Am battling mouth access at the moment”

“Cognitive dissidents”

“They have another think coming”

“We know the Zionists had their hands in that pie”

“Crimes have reached endemic proportions”

“A nation like Africa”

“Africa, the most resource-rich nation on this planet”

“Particularly countries like Africa”

“The profits that are made through robbing other countries, like Africa”

“What is the fuck going on?”

“Moreover, the article correctly refers to my being charred with a breach of the peace”

“Justice will be prevailed”

“Whey to go, Tracey”

“Freemasons, you’re supposed to be a paternity, aren’t you?”

“How can it be fake news, dingo berry?”

“We’ve seen the children’s testaments”

“It would be better to have a heavy milestone hung around his neck and drown in the depths of the sea”

“And suddenly there’s police offices coming to get Grandmother.”

“The guy has an ulterior motif”

“Something is aloof here”

“Extreme emotional mood swings, indicating a very unstable state of mine”

“At least you weren’t reported by a fiend”

“Telling the truth never was your strong suite”

“The gold was quarantined under the Indonesian Ocean”

“I’ve got one word to say to you, Daily Mirror: FUCK OFF!”

“Jim Humble doesn’t promote giving bleach enemies to children”

“I won’t name him…His name’s Tony”

“Christian is a made up phrase”

“Have all these satin worship people been stopped?”

“He made remarks to me about my ‘eyes’ but he didn’t mean the ones in my head”

“Chemtrails – there were none of these in the sixteens”

 “All your pedos are belong to us”

“One thing that the EU did provide to Britain was cheap medicines and cheap food”

“Use you brain a little”

“FBI – what does that stand for? Nobelts, Cunts and Assholes?”

“Remember – trolling is an art and I am Picassio”

“Kris Kosta aka Jacqui Framer”

“This is literally 1984”

“When you’re a Lady in the House of Commons, what do they call you?”

“These people are like rabbits – they ride bicycles and wear woolly hats”

“Under the Treason Act of 1776 if you say ‘Boo’ to God, you are hung”

“I am unto you, Dearman”

“Who’s gonna talk about the elephant on the table?”

“It’s coming down like a house of dominoes”

“This World has become asphalted over like some huge galactic condom”

“Admitting defeat is too strong a word”

“The masses have been dumb down”

“They can’t shut us up. How many times have I got arrested for exposure?”

“Fine to share from my end”

“He missed his vocabulary in life”

“They will be changing their names by depot”

“You’re just a bunch of mutters”

“You’re following the World War 3 gender”

“I’m not trying to sit here and portray myself as some kind of shining border collie of a person”

“Dresden was the Venice of Europe”

“This is gonna start growing expotentially”

“They did a complete three sixty”

“John Taylor and Sarah McCleod are MI5 shrills”

“If thieves broke into your home and stole your wi-fi…”

“No one is as blind as those who don’t listen”

“Most people are not willing to pay these exuberant prices”

“You will not be surprised to believe…”

“The wheat is being separate from the chaff here”

“The adjectives range from ‘traitor’ to ‘hero'”

“Now we’re out of Brexit”

“We have been persuaded to literally shoot ourselves in the foot”

“May you long rest in Hell, wherever you are”

“Great wok, guys”

“That’s doggy as fuck”

“If it comes into fruitation”

“What exonerates them of being innocent?”

“The unseen ones are invisible”

“I founded the Cannabis & Hemp Information Club with the primary aim of erasing people’s awareness”

“I see that Angela Daisy Power’s put one out”

“I’m going to take a puny [sic] here and guess logical thought processes and coherant [sic] writing aren’t your forte”

“Mental illness is in the mind”

“So let’s see where this checkmate goes”

“I must admit I’m a little overwhelmed with the depth and breath of your response”

“They implemented teachers, social services, police, judges, parents, priests…”

“I’ve never been convicted of possessing decent images of children”

“I’m absolutely straining at the bit”

“That man beats women! You condom that?”

“It was the night before you coned Angela”

“You better think about the times you were stoned and contacted me before you stick your dick on the railroad tract!”

“Rout in Hell!”

“It seizes to amaze me”

“Yes, there are some lovely spots around her. Looking forward to discovering more of them in the coming weeks”

“My point is always trying to get the BBC to expose themselves”

“With hindside…”

“A place called Crocodile in Russia”

“Covert drugging – please share”

“Yet the sheep still gaze blissfully”

“Angela’s in trouble for exposing the Hampstead children”


“BBC stands for bloody bullshit!!”

“That little European island that we call England and Scotland”

“The judge has done a premature ejaculation of the case”

“Never go to Scotland, including Nottingham”

“Now is the time to strike the iron while it’s hot”

“I’ve been waiting with debated breath”

“Your crimes have been undercovered”

“That’s called slander or misogyny”

“There are other people linked to her, possibly family members”

“I’ve noticed them trying to get onto Tracey, slowly trying to work their way in”

“I can prove up the kazoo”

“Tell Wavy to whine his neck in”

“…these useless people that has no education…”

“We’ve basically got them by the balls in a nutshell”

“The satanic paedos are flaying around”

“These people are so stupied”

“Your controllers don’t give a dame about you”

“I need to learn to stick to sauce material”

“You’ve added so many dots together”

“All things are relative and on every level”

“I’m doing my care of duty”

“A public servant can only come in our face if they’re going to be our mum or dad”

“Bare with me and please share”

“I’m washing my hands with you all”

“Doctors who break their hypocritical oath…”

“We’re talking about hundreds of billions of pounds… Does that put it into perception?”

“They commit crimes of humanity”

“An argument’s pointless. coz that means you’re both shouting and neither of you are listening. Or vice versa”

“Facebook know ya on something, brother” [Meant ‘onto‘]

“I hope it’s true. It came from a good sauce”

“I trust you imsplicitly”

“We’re meant to be joint at the hip”

“It knocks you back for six”

 “Home economics should be compulsive in schools”

“I spent over half an hour deleting comments from my lice stream”

“If something’s too good to be true, it’s either gonna be true or it’s not”

“The word of the day is ‘parental alienation’”

“Eleanor Roosevelt was the first woman in America”

“Andy I’ve massaged you”

“They’re scared of losing their pension. They’ve got houses to feed”

“We’ve certainly caused a presence”

“They’re just doing what they can to do whatever they can”

“Gordon’s exposed himself to me”

“It could have been put to breast there and then”

“Even a stopped clock is right twice a year”

“You came to me and said you trust me impeccable”

“What an intricate web they’ve cast”

“When you’ve removed all possibilities, what’s left is the truth”

“This island England belongs to us”

“Fortunately Edward didn’t make it”

“Your arseholes were warned”

“I went to the Ideal Exhibition Show”

“We’re all prawns in the game”

“They know if they do anything to us, if they kill us, it’s only going to prove them right”

“They haven’t got logical rationing to work out what’s going on”

“A lot of countries have a lot of corruption and Africa is one of them”

“Never a truer word spoken in jest”

“Why are you listening to these idiots? Why are you even giving them an inkling of time?”

“You arseholes are causing mental health”

“You keep that truth from not getting out and I’ll keep that truth from getting out”

“That’s what it says in the Manga Carta”

“Edward Ellis deserves a noble peace prize”

“The more fags are flying, the better it’ll be”

“I want you to Google ‘the swamp Theresa May’. Just those two words”

“Biffed out his nut on cocaine, what he said about Celtic and Rangers proves he is out to cause discourse”

“If you wish to expose yourself, be my guest”

“We’re waking the masses up in drones”

“I expect an apology but I won’t fucking get one”

“I can speak for myself and I’m pretty sure every veteran can too. They’re all men, women and children”

“Do you think he could be a member of a funny handshake?”

“I was trying to help out Gordon. We was joined as hips”

“Well, you are humans. You’re monsters. That’s what human means”

“Then Brian Sedgefield pulled me off”

“Your game’s numbered”

“Hoaxtead Research are gonna be under the firing line”

“There’s wind turbans at the back of us”

“By the feather you choose to fly with, mate, you’ll all be tarred with the same brush”

“John Wanoa’s gonna help, so that’s added extra strings to the bow”

“…the sanctimony of marriage…”

“For anyone who hasn’t read the title of this video, I’ll re-eriterate it”

“All John’s honey traps must be returned”

“All charges have been dropped on him”

“John’s just an escape goat”

“A sleeping dog will never lie”

“Just remember that door will come knocking”

“We were joint at the hips”

“I’m just poising the question”

“I just want to say we’re on top of John Wanoa”

“I stood by my ground at that time”


“Foriengers with no education”

“If you outstep the mark…”

“Those people that are on that yellow vest have got vested interests”

“We can grow expotentially”

“All those GCACs and O-Levels”

“Whatever the law says does is does”

“No kidding of a lie”

“They’re protecting the children from getting justice”

“According to him, I’m a conducted paedophile”

“The detractors are like a mosquito. No one believes them”

“You’re just being antagonative”

“I’m the fittest 69-year-old I’ve ever seen or ever met”

“The pain is excruciable”

“Under what grounds?”

“You really are quite backwards”

“19 years and still fighting fir justice”

“I’ll give you a breakdown in a minute, Angela”

“Let’s look him up on the bayleaf register”

“There is a world war every hundred years”

“Yannis threw me under the bridge”

“2011 article it will prolly vanish now eh or get heavily detracted”

“If you put up with people who go around refusing to give you cancer…”

“We have 50 states. Of course, Alaska and Hawaii are off-shore.”

“I can’t work out whose the most dumbest between him and Crossman”

“Rouge sickos have covertly poisoned all”

“It’s always best to leave these trolls on tinderhooks”

“Some people call me stupid. I’d like to say I have got a genius HQ”

“It’s plain for anyone that’s got an inkling of arse”

“We’re being sabotaged by igronant, uneducated idiots”

“Je parle petit pois”

“…a sadistic and murderous paedophilic cult led by their father, who is from Rotherham in Lancashire”

“Alcohol, drugs, sex… NEVER GIVE UP!!!”

“She’s hit a can of worms”

“They’re being raped and tortured by a bunch of sycophants”

“They are a law above themselves”

“She’s a lover, not a fighter. But bloody hell, she’s a fighter as well”

“Recently Edward Ellis has been trying to get kidnapped”

“Coz no one else on this Earth will go to this length to throw out the red herons”

“You cannot afford to go on like this, poking your head against the parapet”

“R – – – –  D – – – – – -, aka Jeffrey Epstein, aka Jimmy Savile”

“As we celebrate, unfortunately, the 5-year anniversary…”

“I don’t mind putting my neck on the woods”

“I just do not understand the seriousness of what’s going on here”

“If I hide you from my channel, you ain’t gonna be able to see me”

“They upset the ball wagon”

“Meanwhile, back at the branch…”

“He’s an enema of the state”

“I believe the police are still not standing down and doing their job”

“They’ve had crimes perpetuated against them”

“It’s beneficiary to us all”

“You sow what you reap”

“Two words – Sparkle is not a racist”

“Does New Zealand have a time zone?”

“You’ll know them by your deeds.”

“Out of 7 trillion people on this planet…”

“We WILL bring this fucking satanic country to a downstill”

“I’m not after an apology… I’ll give you my two houses just for you to come back and apologise”

“That outstepped the mark”

“…a covert recording to frame her with malicouls content”

“Knowing the truth will set you three”

“She’s been exposing some very stupid intelligent people”

“I agree with the boarder wall”

“The Hampstead children case was a travesty of misjustice”

“I’ve got a beautiful lady who wishes to remain not nameless”

“So f*ck off and leave Carol Woods alone or else you will face desire consequences”

“I’ll be glad to sign your partition”

“Let’s not beat the bush”

“I’m glad I’m getting the recognition that I finally deserve”

“It grows expotentially”

“Trolling Danny Jones by royal degree”

“On the phone to JP now – he’s being moved to a mental world”

“Add all the dots together, you idiots”

“I’m not designed to be shut up in a cell for 26 hours a day”

“…William Booth, who shot Lincoln, and John Wilkes Booth, who shot Kennedy…”

“I think people forgot that I can play chest”

“I spent two minuets on a video”

“When I was 27, I had four teen-aged children”

“…the Midlands, which is where Lancashire is…”

jk show

“You don’t know fuck-all about partay-sintex-grammar”

“I am a mind of information”

“You’re all very hobophobic.”

“Is anybody gonna start reading these liens and taunts with us?”

“All Wanoa wanted to do was take everything off the people that had been stolen from them”

“There was a lot of going on”

“I’m telling you now – you’d better stop thinking”

“The police have got no morrows”

“On that note, I shall end you”

“My yougube channel experiencing remote interfence”

“Your words could never hurt me. Just like sticks and stones”

“This guy has gang-stalked us and written about how tasty baby bullocks are”

“I don’t like people that come in wolf’s clothing”

“Mark my space – this ain’t over”

“You can cast aversions just like those warlocks cast their spells”

“A crook of bullshit”

“Sound the fool you do trying to be cleaver!!”

“It’s difficult to separate the wheat from the caff”

“I beggar to differ”

“This is only in the Daily Mail – why is it not in the mainstream media?”

“The sever can’t be reached”

“John Paterson… needs the correct diet… coz they know if they don’t give him the correct diet, that illness can come back and he can have a burst follicle and that’s him dead”

“It’s a bit of a squagmire at the moment”

“This isn’t just fraud – it’s two sides of both coins”

“I’ve personally looked into 1.4 million companies”

“I never mind somebody who comes in my face”

“The world’s a stage, and we’re all getting played”

“This thing could be the domino that takes the whole house of cards down”

“We won World War 3 against the children”

​“Thank you for coming on my feed and exposing yourself”

“Say it loud with your chin held high”

“…a paltry fatality rate of just 0.12%, far lower than the seasonal flu, which has a mortality rate of about 0.1%”

“Wherever I lay my hat is where I am”

“And I’ll put that in brackets, because when you put it in brackets, it means it’s not really there”

“Meanwhile, back at the branch…”

“With any further ado…”

“I’m still in the same box as Gandhi and the Deli Llama”

“They’ve been in power since Norman the Conqueror”


“I’m taking a breath or as David Livingstone allegedly said, ‘I’m going in to the jungle. I may be some time’”

“Only God can give a license to do wrong and he gave that to us all”

“All we have to do is stand up and say the two most powerfulest words – ‘No!’”

“I’m not talking about the complicatedness of the wotsit. I like to keep it simple”

“They have to inverse it to get the truth”

“As the saying goes, Hell has no fury as a woman scorned”

“You police think you can force people to stay in their doors”

“…the corrupt police, who have rusted up some charges…”

“John went to all the medias”

“Where was I when I was so politely interrupted?”

“The evidence has been severed”

“Be square, otherwise be there”

“You can’t run before you can jump”

“I don’t consent to their acts and statues”

“As long as I’ve got a bone in my body, I will still be fighting”

“We’re all fighting the same causes to get rid of kids”

“I’ve got an IQ”

“I am inclined awake”

“If you’ve had a flu vaccine in the last few months, you’re four times more likely to contact a virus”

“I’m as infannible as the next man”

“All you people on the left are the biggest idiots there is”

“Money is no compricenty to knowledge”

“Muslims is not a group of people… and Islam is not a religion”

“You are dumer than a box of rocks”

“Your sentance shows how stupid you are”

“I’m  serounded by lefty fucktards”

“We will beat you at the poles”

“So this person is also sympathasistical of having terroristical traits”

“Now to people who don’t understand what a wordpress is, a wordpress is a file which journalists use, where people can go on blogs”

“It’s all proof in the pudding”

“Women are getting threatened with kids”

“Paterson, the victimised peachful warrior”

“I can’t think of the word I was gonna think about”

“This is what I’ve been focusing on from the off-go”

“We’ve all worked hard for our clause”

“We’re not the problem because we’re a problem. We’re a problem coz we’ve been made a problem”

“As Sherlock’s Holmes said…”

 “The guy at the beginning of this clip undermines me of a Fonejacker character”

“Edward Ellis is an 11-year-old homeless pauper”

0 (1)


“He was best friends with the Rockefellows”

“I’ve been harassed by Paris Hilton” <<< Matt Taylor’s take on Paris Barrington

“I’m not sure there are many who matted”

“I just saw a video with Dr Fucki”

“Until you know that, you won’t know it”

“Those that are deceived can be deceived”

“We take your hat off for doing that, Andy”

“We had Bill Ryan discussing the Anglio-Saxon mission”

“…a sickening odour emulating from a non-ferigerated truck…”

“Last night’s show was spoilt by the trolls, who came in their troves”

“America had 250 million people disappearing”

“I couldn’t find her shade of plumb”

0 (2)

“It was my fault, for a better word of it”

“You can’t intimidate me. I’m a singe mother”

“We’re sending a message to anybody that will listen out there and expire people all around”

“I drove all the way here from a very long place”

“I’ve been otherwise obtained”

“There would never be a raised voice. There would no be never no need to”

“If they come on my domicile without permission…”

“If the food shits, wear it”

“Mental cigarettes have been banned”

“King Arthur is not a fictional character. He’s a real fictional character”

“It just goes of saying…”

“We’re all told we’re related to COVID-19”

“I can show you exactly where on Danny’s show she exposed herself”

“There were more cops than protestants”

“Clearly this guy is a few bob short of a shilling”

“You can never not get rid of me. Know what I mean?”

“We’re a very small lily pad on a very small pond in a very big ocean”

“Angela won’t go to prison. She hasn’t murdered anyone”

“You’re the one who puts the lies and the spuke and the splander out”

“Woe and behold…”

“There are names that not only get me sent to prison but there are other names that bring me out in balls”

“The UK and Greece aren’t even in the same continent”

“…the Saxy-Coburg-Goth bloodline…”

“The evidence suggests Gordon was a snake salesman”

“He unwittedly become a part of it”

“We’ve all got a sub story”

“You can’t call yourself a truther if you’ve lost at least two YouTube accounts”

“That’s the end all be all of it. They need mental health”

“…Wikileaks, also known as Wikipedia…”

 “The ‘ni’ in ‘Nazi’ stands for ‘Zionism’”

“This is a disease that attacks health”

“Andy’s thrown down the bridge to Flo Destroyer”

“That’s the simple of it is”

“I’m glad I made that decision rather than sticking my head back down the parapet”

“John was convicted of committing no crime”

“I hope you’ve rung the notification bill”

“I’ve got a soft spot for Sophie Ellie Baxter”

“Who’s coming in the Zoom?”

“Do you realize we have 7.5 million people on the planet?”

“I remember my brother back in the 60s spraying his hare”

“I’m not a history buff. Wherever Mussolini was at. Was that World War 1?”

“I feel like I need to get this all out of the open”

“I don’t complain, Sir. I’m making a complaint”

“He’s outstepped his mark”

“It’s my belief that Plisko is joint threat intelligent group”


“It’s fiction, but it’s a fact at the same time”

“If Plisko keeps harassling me like that…”

“They founded out what I do”

“I have no idea who this is or who he’s pertaining to be”

“You can put that in your bank and sail it to the Bahamas”

“My thoughts and prayers are going out with Joe”

“I think I will come less and less on Facebook”

“John is an ex-veteran”

“Paterson does NOT have a mentally illness”

“The flat they went back to was the flat in which Joe lives under”

“Please call Pinewood to stop the murder of JP”

“It does beggar to differ”

“John’s not suffering from any mental health”

“That could not be more 180 degrees from what I’m saying”

“The Hampstead dad has literally shot himself in the foot”

“One cop was of female origin. One was of male origin”

“Can you hear my lips?”

“Are you the new Michael X?”

“John’s made 75,000 arch leader files”

“The World thinks we’re crazy because they can’t see the invisible”

“No that a your job now go back under the bridge we build”

“This is a monumentous time in our life”

“He should be tied up in bungee tape”

“Sounds like you’re confussing yourself”

“Sorry, I didn’t realise I had to ask for permission to respond to a comet on a social media platform”

“When boys get fucking over-hypersensulated…”

“She’s only got one breast. She’s had a vasectomy or something”

“This is the whole part and parcel of the routine”

“John decided against his will…”

“It only aids and beds emotional instability”

“How is your helmet of salvation? Is it strapped on?”

“And the people are that stupid that they can’t see the wool in front of their eyes”

“This planet and its 7.6 million people…”

“She says if I don’t talk about it then people say I am shrill”

“John Wanoa’s had some serious effects on the poisoning”

“It wasn’t about me. It was about me”

“…the fertility of man’s inventions…”

“CCTV will show the chaotic situation of the situation”

“Trolls are trained Marxists”

“I went into the electorial commission and rang them up”

“I did a 5-day course in Los Angeles with RoboCop”

“I miss the old Netflix before it went supper corporate”

“I wouldn’t be damned if he’s not taken over Jimmy Savile’s position”

“Let’s help each other to reach each other’s goals”

“I had to wait for him to stop yabbiting”

“I love you, Robbie Williams. I loved you in Westlife”

“Your fish have brought a sense of senerity to the proceedings”

“You don’t know jack sheep. Fuck off”

“I got a lot of backlash, good and bad”

“To you police, who pertain to be upstanding”

“I’m a sheriff, because I was appointed by a king”

“She has not required any PRN medication. I take it that’s sticking a needle in ya. That’s what ‘PR’ stands for”

“Messrs. I guess that means Miss or Mrs”

“We are here to stop killing babies”

“Her two boys don’t butter an eyelid”

“They’re not really dying of coronavirus. Doctors are writing false birth certificates”

“I’m going to leave by example”

“You co-hearsed those men and women”

“You have sworn on an oath”

“I’m not very fond of the term ‘conspiracy theorist’. I prefer to call myself a corruption analyst”


“The rituals have stayed the same since the beginning of time”

“Sick Ricky’s been caught trying to impersonate the Pink Panther. I’m the real Pink Panther”

“…people like Thomas Dunn of Out of the Black”

“Our movement doesn’t need infilterators.”

“Ron Paul eluded to why coronavirus exists.”

“All these companies are part of the complicincy”

“They were all involved in it and that goes for people in all walk of lives”

“I gave her ample opportunity to apologise to the things she said”

“We’re building a little pâté up of everything the trolls have been doing”

“In 2014, ten suspects were charged with a total of a hundred-and-one fences”

“At Costco 18 bucks for a pack of 50 masks. Rip-off”

“I’m useless at memories”

“There are no agencies that cover this Pacific area of abuse”

“It is ignorance to ask for evidence”

“I’ve put the postcode into the doofus”

“That rides gunshot over the real history of King Arthur”

“In particularly…”

“Money is the love of all evil”

“Ah, I know what song you mean. ‘Fog of the Tango’ by Rolf Harris”

“Wonder how scared he is in Hell knowing he was dupped by the devil”

“What the fook does ‘alumni’ mean? Is it the same as Illuminati?”

“They’re under psychologist warfare by the media”

“Tin and aluminium are the same”

“This is the angle I go from it at”

“There’s so much censorshit that we have to deal with these days”

“Imagine this dark cloud surrounding the earth getting sucked off…”

“The BBC only hires this type of person so their eco chamber self-reinforces”

“I remember Dolly the Sheep being cloned in the 1970s”

“I’ve been touched by angels”

“Do you feel where I’m coming about?”

“They’re coming right now to expectorite you back to the UK”

“It says ‘histrionic’ – does that mean I like history?”

“It’s simtex, spelt S.Y.N.T.A.X.”

“You’re jumping out of the fire into the fat”

“Sculdulgary if you please”

“Complaint to tribuneral”

“There’s nothing two ways about it”

“The Borry St. Edmunds case wasn’t entered into the public records”

“Darren, if you’re listening, I won’t give your name out”

“You can’t catch a virus”

“I hope everything’s tickety-poo”

“Scarlet is also known as Spiny Norman and UK Column!”

“He has a good opriatic voice”

“These little niggets of gold!”

“He was trying to dox me but failing mismally”


“The lust for money is the root of all evil”

“I like what Trump is doing to stop the monopoly on Google, Twitter and Facebook”

“I’m like, what covid pandemic? There are no statistics to back that up”

“Andrea Chrome is blood taken from children”

“That’s where we get anti-seminism from”

“With the resonation, they’ve levitated the stones”

“I was on Obamacare in 2009”

“I’ll leave this dangling on a knife’s edge”

“We’re gonna solve the plight of homelessnessness”

“The Bavarian Monster has appeared on Matt Taylor’s show and launched a nasty attack against him, which amounted to child abuse”

“Covid is affecting the elderly but it’s not affecting the youngerly”


“We can see whether someone is a creator or a destructor”

“You can go into a policeman and report a crime”

“Ultimately it’s all back down to one, where we whence came from”

“Dr. David Kelly was about the weapons of mass destructions”

“That’s what I always say – keep it symbol”

“Piss myself right off, mate”

“Their presents says their wrong”

“You are diswaying people from the truth”

“Covid is a fake scam”

“’I will play until I win,’ said the wine to the blind”

“So sorry for what you’re experiencing by such I’ll-educated people, Jon”

“The truth is in the pudding”

“Cut the wheat from the chaff”

“That’s what I’m internally grateful to Andy for”

“Whatever Andy has done on my behalf has been from his own fruition”

“Our imperfection is what makes us perfect”

“On this Earth which we call Earth…”

“I cannot possibly see for a reason why you’d want to leave”

“He’s working in coercion with Michael Portillo”

“Guy Carpenter was about to be flotationed on the stock market”

“I started studying the Bible in 97/98, so over 30 years ago”

“Try and nudge the viewing figures up a bit more, because again it’s not about the figures but then again it’s about the coverage and coverage is figures… ’cause it’s all about the numbers”

“I don’t like to use expletatives”

“You’ve got a jigsaw pizzle in a million pieces”

“I was born in 1964… I was 18 or 19 in 1984”

“Hampstead is unfolding apace behind the scenes due to senistivity”

“Speaketh thou and thou shalt appear”

“Your days are number”

“Come to me in the privates”

“And it wasn’t until 47 years of my age”

“All I care for is the children. And all I care for is the truth”

“…the crater who made everything…”

“Nothing on mind is really”

“He was meant to have a tribuneral on the 14th”

“Many heads make light work, so to say”

“That case has to see the day of light”

“There’s an energetical light within us all”

“Being a landlord opened my irons up to what idiots we are”

“This is why what we’ve got”

“You ended up deciding to stuff the kids”

“This is very beneficiary”

“We’ve all got a twin and we need to learn to separate the self from the two”

“You Freemasons that do your dirty durds…”

“They were co-hurxed into believing they were the fiction”

“Those people will do as they’re asked of”

“You’re just paying money wilfully and blindfully”

“I saw for myself when I want to the courts”

“More hands make light work, yeah”

“She’s going to give an interview. It’ll be audio, because she doesn’t want to have her face”

“We’ve been lacklustre in getting back to you”

“Thank you. You have made this website blow up”

“If anyone wants to look at it, Full Cabal have done a number two”

“What’s classed as incredulous is now classed as credulous”

“It’s not that big a place America, is it?”

“You remind me of Tory Smith. He’s dead now”

“Private eye (is singular) means in code = all Seeing Eye, its one eye symbolism. Demonic!”

Screenshot (6010)

“The verdict is out”

“This case was three years ago in 2014”

“Even knowing what these little kids, the Hampstead 3, have been through…”

“That’s exactly their intentions of doing”

“The Originees, even the Australian Originees…”

“No one tells me who friends I have”

“We send our children to school to learn how to masturbate. I was one of those wankers too”

By my reckoning, by this time next year you’ll have 15 bazillion people supporting you”

“You’re not brave enough to step behind your shadow and reveal yourself”

“I haven’t replied to people’s emails yet. Sorry if I’ve been a bit lacklustre in my approach”

“VivaStreet, which is some sort of dating site in America, is trafficking children”

“I will come on the street”

“If it means exactly the same forwards, if it means exactly the same backwards, then it’s a fact”

“From the age of four, our children are gonna be taught how to masticate”

“Are you brain dead? The info is on the WHO website. It’s a virus that has a mortality rate of only 99.7% ffs lol”

“They need to pay for the mental health they’ve caused”

“Matt Taylor scores a free kick”

“The Maori people are worriers”

“I’m trying to forget the name of the guy…”

 “They’ve got throat cancer coz they can’t speak out”

“HMRC, the tax company”

“Anybody I associate with takes care to not be misaligned with the extreme right groups”

“London buses kill more people than covid does”

“It’s all smokes and mirrors”


“I wouldn’t be surprised if someone went round to your house to give you a silencer”

“Coronavirus is just a common cold”

“Forearmed is forewarned”

“There is a theory that Shakespeare was an Irish person by the name of Nugent, who paid this ignoramus William Shakespeare to publish his books”

“I want people to try and get this into some sort of concept”

“If we go back post-war, there was no divorce”

“They don’t have to got to do anything”

“You’ve got him bagged to rites”

“You’re headed for the chip-chop and you deserve it”

“May you all jump on board of the land”

“If we think we’re gonna have a clear path, unfetid and without disruption…”

“So I’d already been past this exit on the motorway and I said, ‘Come on, we’ll do a U-turn.’”


“The only thing you’ll get from sticking your head up the parapet…”

“Britain’s a continent, you moron”

“We’re talking about people like Prince Edwards”

“It’s a catch 21 situation”

“It would go away without the vaccine… You’d develop herd mentality”

“I do not abide by any of your acts and statues”

“I am not driving a car, I am transporting myself”

“I am not a person. I’m a man”

“I’ll take everything you’ve ever owned – past, present and future”

“It seems to be the narrative that they want to make protesters violet”

“Poker face means not caving”

“Stick to whatever it is we’re sticking to”

“Following orders, following orders, why don’t you protect our boarders?”

“This is something you need to get your head around very severely”

“We need a national movement to stand up for the children and for the future. I’m sorry it has to be me but if anyone can do it better than me, please. But luckily it’s done by all of us, it’s not me”

“I’m not gonna be part of any reason for their excuses”

“Women and children are allowed to make mistakes. Men aren’t. Period”

“Someone like a local had said to us…”

“It just happened to be that this woman we met works in this tree”

“I’ve got a new Halloween costume today. It’s 20 metres by 20 metres”

“I’m talking about evidence being tampered in”

“It crushes the spirit and causes monumental mental health”

“Forgive them, Lord, for they not know what they’re doing”

“Covid can be contradicted even if you’re wearing the mask”

“That is the factor of the matter in this case”

“I’ll share that on your face now, on your timeline”

“What are you pertaining to be? Are you pertaining to be a public servant? Are you pertaining to be a constable…?”

“Where’s your right to ask me whatever it is you’re asking me?”

“Hey Tom, I just watched SGT report and if you haven’t talked to the guy he had on, you really should. Wilfred Wang”

“Go take a poop in your slim”

“Watergate was Pedogate. That’s true”

“I will repent later”

“I’ve shed tears sitting under him”

“Let’s make this week a week of warshipping the Lord”

“Is that a female peacock?”

“Journalism is gathering the evidence then asking God if it’s true”

 “You know enigmas are done with small smooth tubes in the rectum, right?”

 “My work has been diatribed”

“…the Department of Health and Social Car…”

“Osama bin Laden was not a terrorist but a falcon smuggler”

“You’ve hit way over the mark today, Andy”

“…on the 14th of the fist, 2020…”

“…which legislation further serves to undermind and destroy…”

“By bringing in documents from private profit co-operations…”

“That’s tantramount to treason”

“Whenever you offer an alternative viewpoint, they accuse you of wearing a tinfool hat”

“The half million hits on my blog had nothing to do with you coming on my coat tails”

“We’re coming for a whistle top store”

“She has thrown her teddy well and truly into the corner”

“It’s my civil duty to name and shame them”

“People like you who just watch the British Brainwashing Chanel have no hope of waking up”

“The most lob-sided and indecent thing I have seen from the BBC”

“The people she interviews are one of many”

“Who’s gonna talk about the elephant on the table?”

Screenshot (585)

“I’m not a researcher; I’m just a truth-teller”

“Conflict resolution often comes from conflict”

“Yes!!! The Holy Spirit has comforted me and given me strength! Thank you for obeying Tom”

“He’s washed his dirty lining in public”

“Why slack off your mother in public?”

“May the joy of Lord Jesus Christ be your strength. Slalom”

“And the bottom line I’m making is…”

“Turn the other check and walk away”

“You didn’t come on my live stream last night, did you?”

“He’d like to assign me as a power of attorney slash next of kin slash McKenzie friend. What documentation would we need to do?”

“Coronavirus is just a common cold”

“I have no fucking further wishes to do with you”

“I am not in fact British. I hold about 80-90% southern English DNA”

“If I were to apply for a passport, I would sign it with my autograph, not my signature”

“Drink alkaline water only”

“We’re gonna smash that dome in which we all live under”

“Votes cannot be cast after the Poles have closed”

“It could all be Hollywood fakelery”

“I’ve got a talent for talking to the dead… Tonight I’ll be talking to Babs”

“Jimmy Kimmel you are and idiot”

“I’m not technically very well good”

“Stop the steel”

 “They rode his coat tails for four years and now they’re washing their hands with him”

“I don’t mean hoaxes in the sense that they didn’t happen”

“Dumb liberal is brain wash”

“One thanks for sure Democrats are really stupid”

“Hand ‘em high!”

“I’m being shadow band”

“I intend to use my freedom of expression to the best of its ability”

“He was with a whole psychiatric nurse when he got caught”

“There’s a one in a million chance that you’ll give birth to a two-headed baby”

“That rabid dog has lost all sense of humanity and common scene”

“Vier Männer waren arrested in der vehicle”

”Es it possible, dass er hatte ein heart attack”

“Have the screws been told to pass on to the message?”

“There’s a rumour that Wilfred Wong has been castrated. I can’t verify that… but I’m a very close member”

“I plugged in my laptop the other night and the blew fused”

“Simon Bean has fallen off the planet!”

“He was all gun ho about sticking up for the children”

“Keep exposing them!”

“I will cast enough shadows for people to start asking questions”

“Science is science fiction. Scientific method is not used anymore. Hence science doesn’t exist”

“We aren’t ingorant”

“What the hell is the noise at the being? Sounds demonic”

“You idiots know Heinz catsup is only 21% tomato”

“It’s a case of not playing in their hands”

“Whatever we think we’re suffering, it falls into comparison with what the children are going through”

“She admits it’s conjuncture herself”

“So Hoaxtead scumbags… have outright been outrighted”


“I know my Redeemee lives”

“He’s a victim too. He’s been through the ropes”

“There’s an arrest warrant out for Mark Zuckerbird”

“We don’t pretend to be perfect, we just pretend to be authentic”


“I’m sure the majority of police officers are paedophiles”

“I’ve been using cannabis oil. My penis has grown 7 inches. So I now have a 7-inch penis from using it”

“Isn’t ‘Black Friday’ a racist term?”

“The postage on a 1,400-page document is £1,400”

“I’m really sick of dealing with your asses, because I wanna get on and do my business”

“You stole my footage and that is not ok on YouTube Stream Tube”

“Walter, do you have any goals in life? Do you go out for ice cream?”

“You’re actually causing me the ability not to get employment”

“This election was over and then they did dumps. Big, massive dumps”

“I suggest you keep quit and go on with your business”

“Sharon Gale Fless the UK to Escape Sex Scandal”

“My vote may have been obsconded by cheating”

“You days of terror are coming to an end!”

“The murderers have blood on their heads”

“Oh god, I lost my change of thought there”

“You’ve no evidence to show that the grandparents of those kids were abused”

“I would not survive that, whatever she’s survived”

“Collide silver got my temperature in about an hour”

“As there are many layers of an onion, there are also many elephants in a room”

“Anke und Jane haben pleaded guilty… Man sagt, es ist ein kidnapping oder abduction… Die Polizei sind gekommen mit guns and everything… Ich bin human hunting survivor”

“This is the elephant that’s in the room with a giraffe on its back”

-- fq (2)

“God said that the same devil worshipping people who tried to impeach Trump will assonate him on the second attempt his next term”

“Indoctoration is the word”

“I wouldn’t even wanna think”

“You lot ate so funny”

“In this video I want to talk about Wilfred Wong, the fighter against Saturnism…”

“I’m very under shock”

“They’re satanic puppies”

“No one cares, butt him”

“There are also non-survivors in our group”

“Let me repeat this again for those who a riding the yellow short bus”

“Don’t touch blood, unless you will die if you don’t touch it”

“My genetics changed with massive weight loss”

“I just came into the transmission”

“Don’t forget to go Through the Black dot com and get all your spiritual warfare needs”

“Bless them for they not know what they do”

“None have you have done research on judge”

“Thank you, Niki, for exposing all the pedophile traffickers”

“Covid is just fatigue syndrome… Where’s the pandemic? Where is it?”

“how do we gey common law birth certs and documents needed i cant find any infp for help”

“Get your win research and grow up”

“that’s what at you think dummy”

“The King’s got no clothes on. It’s been exposed now”

“I’ll be alone at Christmas, as in it’ll just be the three of us”

“Seize and desist!”

“We’re under constantly attack”

“I’ve left Mark to his own demeanour”

“That’s the end all be all”

“Covid and corona – the two, erm, there’s a Greek word, if you go back into ancient Greek, the duality of things – it’s called ‘bollocks’. That’s where that word came from”

Screenshot (932)

“Hi guys. Sorry I’m here”

“Liars, liars – pants on fires”

“The most popular place for crop circles is Wilkshire”

“She was a virgin. That means she couldn’t have babies”

“Children don’t lie”

“Can I ask you what a guru is? G.U.R.U.”

“I dunno. Ain’t that meant to be someone who’s, I dunno, I thought it was a, a guru is an expert, innit, like?”

“Another FascistBook casually of the war on freedom of speech!!”

“If you know how to spell vibrator, that just goes to show you have one”

“I’m half-Protestant, half English”

“It was awful. The flash was melting off their bones”

“The evil bustards are coming after her”

“I’ve been accused of being a shrill and offering up false information”

“This stems to what we’re talking about”

“They need to be held account to that”

“Without an omelette you can’t have broken eggs”

“I don’t want to block people from my channel coz then they won’t be able to see my videos”

“Wilfred Wong has been wrongfully convicted”

“I got that from an American Christian site I follow called Through the Dark”

“She passed but it was not from Covid 1984”

“Both nationally, internationally and personally”

“This is gonna be a long live stream. I’m gonna go hard”

“I think it’s the vaccine what’s causing the covid”

“I was wetting myself so much, then I sent it to my friend”

“I’m aspergic but I’m not autistic”

“The calvary is coming, Mr. President!”

“There’s a small group of people who own the whole shebam”

--- fq

“We’re just little clogs in the machine”

“When they said they’re rallying up troops, did they mean they’re rounding up protestors?”

“If we were meant to wear masks, wouldn’t we have been born with them?”

“I have no intelligence, by the way”

“Arrest my case”

“Until he’s no longer the president, we won’t support him. But right now he’s our president and we’re here to support him”

“Christians were chased out of Germany in the 1940s”

“Does the Chile Protection League have a website?”

“The abduction is being portrayed as a kidnapping by the English press”

“Did anybody ask the child if he was kidnapped? Coz if that child went willy-nilly, is that kidnapping?”

“Angela is working with you guys and she brings you a case of herpes”

“I danced with Burno Mars in a club. It was fun”

“That doesn’t mean you ain’t doing the sane thing you accuse others of doing”

“Shaun Attwood is a government shrill”

“I’ve built my stuff up from the scratch”

 “It shows their modus mammorandi”

“These people are fucking doodally”

“I’m a child sexual abuse, you know, and child experiment, drugging, whatever survivor”

“The Hampstead kids together and severally confirmed each other’s testimonies”

“I’ve said this over and over and over again at nauseum”

“He’s caused alarm, distress and deformation of character”


“He’s literally really bad”

“You will remain in purgatory for eternity!! I will make sure of that personally”

“Attwood and Wedger delivered a recording breaking podcast”

“I mean, we’re in a time where we’ve been put under house arrest for a cold”

“…the British troops at Guantanamo Bay…”

“A lot of people are suffering with mental health”

“If they represent intelligence, I will take unintelligence, thank you”

“I don’t make base allegations”

“Not sure what his defination of a good researcher is”

“The remains would need to be digged up”

“She can dish it out but can’t it”

“Just a wolf in sheepskin clothing”

“What this space! This is just the beginning”

 “Round up, round up, ladies and gentlemen!”

“There will be an uprise”

“Men up and stop going around enforcing acts and statues on people wilfully and nilfully”

 “…his stupid failed investigism…”

“There’s an eon and an ion. One’s negatively charged, one’s positively charged”

“Only fathers who have sexually abused their daughters would worry about their daughters going to secondary school”

“I am not abusing any of you bollockless freaks”

“He didn’t even know where was the exists”

“This is Danny Jones’s response to my assertation that he’s a paedophile”

“You’re introducing child abuse into it, which is muddling the waters”

“This enforcement here is working hand-in-hand with the triangle, with the pyramid of pleasure”

“The King Flag for the save passage on Earth”

“That woman’s name is Maxine Griswell, friend of Epstein”

“You’re employing stupid people who haven’t got a fucking iota what they’re doing”

“President Trump is in the back of the stage just waiting for the curtains to open and walk out on stage as the 19th President of the new America”

“…David Shayler, who was head of MI5 or MI6…”

“This court case is the tree but guess what, it’s not made of wood. It’s not a real tree”

“Hop to it, Danny! Chop chuey!”

“It’s a fruitution of his lifetime’s work”

“I’d like to see a list of the honorary students. Let’s see who’s studied at the Troll Academy”

“Matt Hancock is literally a creature of the Guinness family”

“The Christian calendar has been bastartised”

“Thanks to people literally picking me up and carrying me through those difficult days”

“I’ve reported you to my local MP”

“Many events have been counselled due to the pandemic”

“Kaley lives to fart away”

“I have a pubic channel”

“I don’t want these weirdos sniffing round me, I’ve never been part of a cliche”

“The oranges of the word ‘fuck’ are…”

“I am not technically very well good”

“I probably would have voted for Trump to stop the Clintons, Bidens, Obamas and Bushes”

“I love Brain Harvey. I always have”

“I’ve been lamb basted in the press”

“Tell JL to shit up. He’s embarrassing”

“I don’t try to hide my lies anymore! I got ousted a long time ago”

“Of course Pence did not want to come. He is a trader!”

“DO A PlSS TEST! Do it live with me in front of the Sun newspaper, live on YouTube, in front of the World!”

“She shouldn’t be writing children’s books for children”

“Why did the riots suddenly stop after the election? Think about it”

“I’m done with people with grammar. I’m done with people who’ve been to university”

“He was happy as a Larry”

“Most members of the cult have sadomistic tendencies”

“The Hampstead gang includes the father of A ____  and G _____. That’s the two wee boys and girls that gave these statements”

“When you look at some of the witch trials of the 17th century, there is a degree of fairness to them”

“Now they refuse to acknowledge it. Cart blank – it doesn’t happen”

“You fucking nut gob”

“Tamsin Greig, spelt G.R.I.E.G., same as Hollie Gregg”

“In 2003 I was the top ten funniest person in the United States”

“If I wanted to, I could perfect it to perfection”

“Arrest my case”

“I’m amazed at the rescues God has rescued me from”

“Keep it quiet. Keep it on the download”

“We live in that oxymoron kind of day and age”

“I’m like a woman who hasn’t shaved her bush”

“Your dumb”

“Are you coming in my house?”

“I believe in the three tenants of Christianity”

“They’re all connected like a Monopoly board”

“The old boy network is unsalibale”

“My fruit bowl at the moment is chock-a-plock”

“Maybe we will meet in Bakewell and you can bring your violin and I can bring my megaphone and we can do a jamming session”

“What you’re doing is nannying the state”

“Folks, a friendly reminder: murder is legal”

“Let me introduce the ingrediences to you”

“I try not to come on YouTube”

“I really do need a Jack Daniels to work it all out but sadly I ain’t got no dog to drink from this weekend”

“Jesus survived the Crucifixion and moved to Wales”

“I suffer with mental health”

“None of us are controlled. None of us have strings to pull”

- fcq (2)

“This isn’t shit and giggles”

“Being gay is a bit of a trend now”

“I was in the depths of disparity”

“You think divvy is written with two Vs do you, FMC? WHY? BECAUSE THIS SATANIC WORLD TELLS YOU!”

“Why’s FMC coping and pasting parts of my comments?”

“I would like to spend two minuets with the sick brain dead people that clicked the thumbs down”

“I like to say things on the spear of the moment”

“Saturn worship is evil”

“John Paterson is an ex-veteran”

“Those are my alienable rights”

“I will put it in speech brackets”

“You can’t actually separate them two people. They’re literally two different ends of the same dog”

--- fcq

“That’s what the chemtrails are there for, to stop our pineal gland from connecting with our higher selves”

“I don’t care whether John Paterson’s your father or your son, whichever, vice versa”

“John is years ahead of any timelines”

“Why do you think I do what I do? I do what I do because I’ve done what I’ve done”

“Powis Police requested that I refrain from displaying the boy’s name, because a gagging order had been imposed upon him”

“John Paterson, who’s allegedly due in court”

“They’re going to infilterate the media”

“Hoaxtead got both my channels taken down but I got one re-inserted”

“Surely upon surely…”

“Bliss you for doing what you have done to look out for John”

“He’s been suspended by the IPCC, the Independent Police Conduct Authority”

“A little pre-ample to that…”

“Right – two days to countdown!”

“Your mother should have taught you that two wrongs don’t make a right. Sumbag”

“Fucking pair of spastic cunts. I’m going to retract that word, because it’s offensive to spastics”

“There ya go! Nothing to see here! No trickety taboo here”

“God bless everyone that signed the petition and shared it everywhere… I’ve got maximum respect for every one of you… But a lot of people I’ve got no respect for, coz none of you did it… I support every single one of you”

---- fcq

“Constables – do your goddamn duty and start arresting yourselves”

“I want you to let that take on board, right”

“Listen up, Mister Policewoman!”

“For I concur, we can’t make the horse drink the water, we can only make it available, or sow the seed and wait for it to sprout”

“People get dummer by the minute”

“Merlin is recorded in the ancient Welsh annuals as a warlord”

“They’re companies inside of companies. They’re like Chinese dolls, or should I say Japanese dolls”

“They’re literally not just money laundering but people laundering”

“I take responsibility doe my own actions”

“It’s not rocket a our car lads”

“This is literally a tsunami now”

“You reap what you say”

- fq----

“This decisions we’ve made in this mortal cool called life”

“I cannot find the Pacific thingybob I was looking for”

“’Line of Duty’ fans saw AC12 (I believe ‘AC’ stands for ‘assistant constable’)…”

“As a result of Harry and Meghan’s Omfrah interview…”

“Bare with me, guys”

“Vaccines cause Asperger’s and ADHD”

“The chat was full of the nounce squad”

“Perhaps this is totally accepted behaviour. We’re all consulting adults”

- fcq 3

“He’s asking you questions but the mods keep counselling him out”

“I’ll do anything for you, Sleepydawn Morgan, just as I’ll do anything for anyone”

“Sussex Police don’t like people like us talking about this, can we?”

“We all know that women are good at multi-tasking, so I’m sure you can curdle your hair while typing”

“When exposing people with mental health, you have to be responsible”

“The mother of my children are very strict”

- fcq 4

“David Baron Ward will be sadly lost”

“No doubt I’ve mispronounced his name wrongly”

“When life comes to lemons, I’m taking great delight in banning you”

“We would have heated diabetes”

“I’m only having a bit of laugh”

“At the end of the day we only have 24 hours in a day. Out of those 24 hours we’re asleep. Out of the other 24 hours we’re doing things”

“We still do not agree on every facet of the spectrum”

“…Darwinists and other types of Mason…”

“I’m probably gonna do a show on owls. Owls are not what they seem”

“The ‘U’ in ‘UFO’ stands for ‘Satan’”

- fcq 5

“Here we have Mr Inappropriate saying Donald Trump drinks adrenochrome. Of course, this is just an allegation by Donald Trump”

“It’s funny to watch you all get hollier than thou”

“I feel, well, let’s be the crash test bunny”

“Everyone knows how hard it is to share your most vulnerable parts”

“I have a care of duty to those people”

“You can look this up on YouTube. It’s very real”

“I know why you’re doing the lockdown – because you want the adrenochrome. You want the children’s blood”

“He’s allowed to leave the North Pole once a day a year”

“This sadly is the prize to pay for being my number one subscriber”

“There’s no shape on Earth I arranged for anyone to leave messages on my chat”

“You’ve been a laughing stalk for 20 years”

“Wow, I feel privileged to have been apart of this moment”

- fcq6

“Join us in exposing satani ritual abuse”

“You are an idiot. Cone back when you get your facts straight”


“Satanism – their rituals work. Summons demons are summoned”

“Energy doesn’t exist”

“Sorry to butt you in”

“I’m coming so fucking hard you won’t see it… Bleeding Heart, you need to come strong now… Lord Nibbler, I’m coming. Nurse Sue, I’m coming”

“When it came to push to the shove…”

“There was a big ding-doo between Nurse Sue and Lord Nibbler”


“I’m tech-dyslexic”

“They chop human meat up in avatars”

“Tell me about the 2001 machete attack. I missed all that, coz I was in America until 1990”

“I welcome Kaley’s drama. She’s a friend of mine back from the day”

“You’re a prick, mate. If I put my hands on you, you’ll know”

“Archer has satanic eyes. Is she related to the father in the Hampstead case?”

“Today [23rd May] is the anniversary of the 7/7 bombings. Is that coincidence or numerology?”

“Cunts are useful, Hoaxtead aren’t”

“You can stick your democracy up your arse, mate”

“Sprout a fucking brain cell!”

“I never ask you to show your face. I take you at face value”

“I think I was on Brian’s dream team last night”

“She’s the worst thing since sliced bread”

“And they brought in Joy Dykes. Now this Joy Dykes – and I don’t know what she is but I know what it sounds like she is and it’s pretty much what it sounds like really”

“So yes, that’s why they’ve changed the sentencing date to the 27th, because Mondays and Thursdays are the Talmudic courts”

“For it to be considered a ‘mass shooting’, it needs to take place in a lager area”

“I would be asking her Pacifics about what happened between her and Joe Biden”

“Hold on. Just speak among yourself”

“And if anyone calls King John Wanoa ‘Crusty’, you’ll have me to answer for”

“Jazzy has gone down in the annuals of Matt Taylor TV’s history”

- fcq2

“We’re pretty certain that Chris Fay is a member of the Fruitcake Munchers Club”

“I was heavily mentioned on the Fruitclub Munchers Cake this morning”

“You’re extrapolating my dude”

“We’re not gonna have Bleeding Heart bullied. Let me take that very clear”

“I’ve got every 19 phone calls that you called me”

“Mission not accompliced”

“It’s funny – eventually all conspiracy theories turn out to be conspiracy fact”

“It’s so refreshing to see the mainstream media reporting on this. This is from SupChina…”

“It’s only a matter of time, surely, before aliens are amongst us and appearing on the Jonathan Ross chat show”

“Everything is interwined, isn’t it”

“Andy’s not my guru from a long-shot”

“Chartal was once an ex-partner of Brian Hurle”

“He’s a name I know but it’s not a name I’m familiar with”

“My mum knew who Queen was. She knew who Freddie Wercury was”

“We all understand that I mean Sharon Gale when I say SJ”

“Not that I’ve tried homosexuality but I have had a snog with a ladyboy in Hong Kong”

“I don’t want someone who’s gonna phone in and be hobophobic”

“I can’t afford the £25 to get a bottle of spirits and a bottle of wine and a couple of nibblers”

“Here’s me egging up Danny Jones and he comes up with crud like that”

“It’s an intelligent gathering exercise”


“Thank you Matt for having Nikki on, that’s admiral of you”

“Brian Harvey is a classic example of an apology, a sincere apology and a genuous apology”

“I’m the first one to fall for that bullshit and I of all people should know not to have”

“It’s all the more better having these 40 subscribers”

“She’s got a bug against bringing the police into the conversation”

“I’m not proud. I reserve that for God”

“It’s up to you to side-step that hate bomb, if you please so”

“A problem halfed is a problem shared”

“That Nikki Lee interview has gone stratostrophic”

“Brian’s popularity dawns into insignificance”

“We’re all sons of gods”

“This lull before Armagetton hits us”

“I miss the comraderyship”


“One person’s freedom fighter is another person’s hero”

“Take a breast of the situation”

“They owe me a writtenology”

“It really makes you wonder if our future is our past? Dinosaurs – DNA experiments that went wrong?”

“If you care to indent yourself…”

“He was molestering them”

“The body was found in a park in Wemberley”

“’All things in moderation,’ the Bible says”

“The boat’s owner only came once a year”


“Yolande was helping the grandson of the African dictator Desmond Tutu”

“He was congratulating me for taking divisive action”

“I didn’t have time to tell her what had happened Pacifically”

“This is what it’s like being shadow band”

“Can you not ready what I wrote?”

“What type of bread is that doggy?”

“He used to fill them with stollen goods”

“I’m spilling the tea on Brian Harvey”

“I don’t know on Earth what is happening there”

“I like a good sausage in the morning, both orally and in the suppository style, if you know what I mean”

“I myself never got into the gamer”

“He started saying anti-semantic remarks to a Jewish feller that was in there”


“He wanted to sell me some but it never went down. I never went through it”

“I sat down with a young lady. The mum was in the kitchen next to us, listening to what we were doing”

“He lives in Torbay, Torquay, or whatever you wanna call it”

“Ange out-beats you, mate”

“We’re gonna play out with a little dingle”

“I made an on-the-spur decision”

“No one bat-mouths Katy B. I don’t care who you are”

“Praterson got locked up in a secure mental faculty”

“It’s got butter squash in it”

“It’s amazing how after two years these idiots are still failing for the same story”

“I’m shoulder-to-shoulder with John Wanoa, Andy Devine and myself”

“I hope they fuck in Hell. Coz people are fucking over each other here”


“I don’t want to see FM Club and the other trolls with their continuous word magic”

“I’m off my rocket? Then I must get off my rocket and fly away to the Moon”

“Show me the email to prove that you are lying”

“I’m now full swing helping to organise the amazing Biblical event which is the exposing of satanic ritual abuse in London”

“Today I got guided to Palm 70”

“Rainbows are the cause of poisonous chemtrails in our skies”

“Jemal, I want to speak to more about you”

“Hell hath no fury than that of a mother’s scorn”


“And when we want to take cameras into the camera…”

“I kid you not, everyone – I’ve got goosepumps”

“It does take you back into time”

“’Palliative care’ means you’re a paedophile”

“… children and babies including you, Jeanette”

“Ric, look at Martin Luther King! Malcolm X was the black man that shot him”

“When England was invaded by Spain…”

“I was well known long before I came all over Streamyard”

“You haven’t got the galls to speak up”

“Remember – in life there’s the highway, my way or the civilised way”

“You are my subordiate”

“You dirty little trump”

“Chin cheers!”

“Wasp was certainly interesting to hear from me”

“She was in the heated of the moment”

“Malone might be the grandson of Molly Malone”

“We’re on 967 subscribers. That’s 10 away from the magic one thousand!”

“Men suffering from homosexual attraction should pray”

“Do you think she is guilty or is it to make the dad look like she was lying?”

“We have to stop them from going after their adrenalised blood”

“You can carry on fraffing”

“I hope everyone enjoyed the Alan Wilson fest that we all enjoyed today”

“Believer what thou want”

“Once bitten, twice sly”

“I senserly applaud everything you do Jon”

“There’s no higher authority than man, coz there’s only God above man”


“Jo Anne Sollis, who in my opinion infiltrated Gordon Bowden”

“Hidden in plain sight is one of the key tenants of Masonry”

“Idi Amin was a good man. People cannot say he was not a good man. His ethics were right”

“I’ll fuck any man! In fact, I’ll fuck two men! Come at me!”

“Danny Jones is Plisko’s cousin”

“I’ve got three people who’ve told me that. I class that as fact when I get three”

“I’m coming down hard on bits of arseholes”

“If it was someone famous, like Ricky Servais”

“These are some of the threats he’s made to venerable women”

“There’s a lot of female testosterone in the house tonight”

“Exactly! You don’t want 55 people coming on your channel”

“Oh my fucking giddy giddy”

“No one wants to sit here and listen to me drown on”

“You’re just an English version of Plisko, you German Kraut!”

“I said a long tome ago Danny should stick to making animations”

“The line manager was off his face on coke”

“I’m the actual person who helps the key workers in the UK”

“Everyone who gets in my way will get both barrows”




“Now I can have Tom Niedermeier for deformation of character”

“I offered myself on a plate to Shaun Attwood. He said, ‘I’ll take the plate and you can fuck off.’”

“We’ve won. We’re winning”

“A few people jump of this fucking bridge. Let’s hope they’re not victims of Danny Jones”

“There are a million homes involved in the Hampstead case”

“I’m not attached to the truth, I’m just in pursuit of it …”

“Let’s not beat around the bushes”

“There’s a run-or-flight scenario here”

“Paris, I thought you were such a nice person but when it comes down to it, you’ve got a black man’s heart!”

“Horny Caterpillar is the only gay man on here that I want to turn into a heterosexual”

“We’ve been vindicticated”


“Nothing has yet to be done about this”

“I forget what they call the CPS over there in the UK”

“…when I can do what I’m capable of being able to do”

“We’re gonna expose the most deprived horrors you can imagine”

“Supporting satnic ritual abuse – it’s time”

“You so deserve to be put on a pedalstool Jeanette Archer”

“Don’t worry when you get ridicooed”

“All adreno factories are being exposed and exploded”

“Fuck off, Wilfred is a good man or they wouldn’t jail him”

“Walnut, get out and shake your nutleg”

“You don’t get to do that and not get away with it”

“I’m too clever than you. I’m far too cleverer than you”


“Sajid Javid the new health secretary is a Saturn worshipper”

“Many of Anita are a rent-a-mob crowd”

“She tried to warm people about Marilyn Manson”

“We’ve had quite a few rough days. We’ve been subject to quite a few death threats. I think that’s all due to the Solstice occurring”

“I’m not having that temperature thing. It’s a laser for your head”

“We’re all porns in a game”

“I’m going to address this hyenas attack”

“He spends all his waking hour with a gas mask on”

“I have an academic scholars that will fill an auditorium”

-fcq (2)

“Mickey Mouse is a racist, homophobic pervert”

“I’m not gonna put a mask on, because I’m not a cunt”

“Don’t leave us hanging on a lurch”

“Come on big man – just spit it out”

“I’m not that attached to people believing me but I do try to show evidence from time to time”

“I don’t watch mainstream telly except when I watch the Euros as a once a year treat”

“I don’t wanna piss on anyone’s thunder but…”

“You knob-sucking fucking nonk wanker”

“We all need to come together now, guys. No conquering, no dividing”

“Have you seen that all the chat is about me? It’s literally water off a duck’s back”

“Children have slowly had their common law rights taken away from them in schools. Getting rid of Latin was one of the worst things that’s happened”

“I don’t like to use the word ‘human rights’”

“I said Chinese instead of Japanese, did I? Well, pardon me for having a speech impediment”

“Cressida Dick was head of sumfink…”


“She was criticised – and criticised means it’s kind of true. And there was no rebuffing of it or anyfink”

“The fence is electrocuted”

“Holly shit!”

“Now you will eat what you have sown”

“Fed up with trolls attacking. It’s so reckless. Making threats by using voodoo and violent beheadings”

“Trouser Mousse, why would you put that video up?”

“In nature we should be able to be friends with lions. We have this misconception that lions want to eat us”

“Feel free to have free speech but I’d say man up a bit and bring something stronger than selling/grammar”

“My blood group is rhesus negative, the satanic bloodline. Children of cults are generally rhesus negative”

“Today’s time is all the twos, 2:20”

“I do take umbrance at people who go to the police”

“I have documentary evidence”

“I’m getting ready to going out”


“In Manchester there’s a Muriel that’s just been put up”

“We’re literally a chessboard”

“I wanna be at the front of the queue. I’ll be the first to grab that Kool-Aid”

“Go fuck yourself losers. Peace and love”

“The emphasis is on him to bring the evidence”

“We didn’t know from Adam about this frigging case”

“He literally dragged your name through the shit”

“You’re high on a kite… you’re flying off a kite on morphine”

“Pub landowners are starting to do a prohibition service”

“What you need is an interplanetary VPN”

“If you are calling someone that name prerogatively, they can strike you”

“Are you scuba driving, Esau? You sound like you’re scuba driving”

“I don’t want to do the whole conspiracy thing. I just don’t believe in coincidences”

“Why do you think they only give us two parties to vote for?”

“Darkside red is the colour of crisis actors”

“I want you to remind myself of my childhood”

“We’re here to support satanic ritual abuse”

“Listen, you keyboard warrior who goes around warrying…”

“There is no such thing as coincidences”

“World War 2 – another fake war”

“If you get the chance, there’s a great Channel 4 documentary on BBC iPlayer”

“…the lucfarian agenda…”


“She read the urology at the funeral”

“I watched Mo Gilligan’s stand-up last night. He’s a black chameleon”

“Your answer befuzzled me slightly”

“Do you feel big and hard for doing that?”

“God Bless Hatun – God stroke the wrong’uns”

“You are scumbag 101”

“Wavy, Danny and AJ all turned up at the same time to verehemtally protect the father”

“South-East Asians are two or three feet shorter than your average European”

“They’re not new. They’ve been new for years”

“The Crusades was justified wars”

“His spelling is so bad and he used the same sully words over and over”

“That’s fucking disabolical”

“Are Albinos basically ginger people?”

“We had the Spanish flu just after the Armada”

“What the fuck is Mastermind?”

“We’re like Marmite. Nobody likes us”


“I am sick of responding to you, because the cult keep making my messages disappear”

“When a troll can spell my name right, it shows there’s a level of obsession happening”

“There were no stabbings or rapes before Sadiq Khan became mayor”

“I know Ric well enough to know that whatever he was in prison for he was probably entitled to do”

“They’ve all bedded me to leave them alone”

“I’ve never been convicted of any conviction”

“I’m actually a registered arsonist”

“I suppose you’re the kind of illiterate dimwhit that finds this funny”

“You’ve gotta laugh at life, coz tomorrow we could all get hit by a bus, or a vaccine”

“I believe the pyramids were built with chicken bones”

“The only good thing about Islam is their beautiful churches”

“She’s not Welsh. With a name like Jones, I’d say she’s defo English”

“It’s just chalk. It’s not like I’m running around marching people”

“The age of consent is 15 in Bikini Faso”

“You cat-shagger, I’m gonna put your photo up on lampposts all over your town, so the cats know what you look like”

“This lurch into authorantaism and right wing hogwash is strange”

“Everyone is born a Christian”

“Danny, AJ and Justin are BLANTATENY in bed together”

“You’ve misinterpretated me”

“He has a definite prolific intention”

“Never tell the left hand what the right hand is doing”

“Put a 1 in the chat if you think TND is a boy or a girl”

“Robyn was doing female empowerment and feminism before female empowerment and feminism was even a thing”

“I don’t believe anything any more. I believe they’re coming for us”

“There are urban people, there are suburbia people…”

“The blackout makes us setting ducks”

“As the Welsh would say, kumbaya my Lord”

“Virgos are more likely to be serial killers”

“He came here to try and defamate my character”

“Now your little minion is up Schitt’s creek”

“I will come to see you. I’ll give you a knock. I’ll call the police and make sure they’re there to back me up”

“It’s the most stupidest thing ever”

“You cannot be charged with a crime that you are unreliably unacceptable for”

“I haven’t been a bed yet”

“You keep showing you’re lack of intelligence”


“I got it, truss me”

“That’s Prince William, great-grandson of Lord Mountbatten”

“It’s all come out now – you’re a socialpath”

“Come here and say that! I’ll cut your head off and then torture you to death”

“It’s 11:58 pm, just coming up to midday”

“What’s that tapping noise? It sounds like Morris code”

“A freelance journalist is one who works for no payroll”

“Birds eat insects such as Jackie long legs”

“There’s no such thing as bisexual. You’re either gay or you’re straight”

“FFS, it’s another hostel takeover by the women in the chat”

“There are three types of Americans – Texans, Michigans and Americans”

“Skitz, stop acting dumb, you pheasant”

“We can agree to disagree to agree”

“I’m off to stuff my face with fool”

“You tried to embarrass me. Let me rephrase that: you tried to embarrass me”

“People are salvating over this”

“I know the watershed runs from 9 but what time does it start?”

“I’ve been called MI5 and GCHQ and all this shit. I don’t know who’s paying you to call me that”

“Bash him round the head with your rolling pan”

“Some of us are dealing with reality and not so much people online trying to through us off the truth”

“At least fix your pronounciation”

“You obviously don’t like Ralph but still, why not go onto his face and just talk?”

“I got a triple A at GCSE, so got onto a Biochemistry degree”

“You give too many branches on the olive and there’s no branches left”

“I just wanted to pay homerage to them”

“I’m probably the least racist person you could ever find on the planet”

“They must have been controlled explosions. Look how long the Leaning Tower of Pisa’s been going without falling over”

“They’re exposing themselves continually”

“BBC, Sky News, whatever you wanna call it”

“Whenever I look at the Moon, there’s a little bit in the bottom left that’s missing”

“Covid 19 started in 2020”

“Life is the spice of variety”

“I used to get caned at primary school, and in secondary school, and even at uni”

“He was a 12-year-old teenager”

“I had it all planned. If the police came for me, I was gonna stand my ground and sit on the floor”

“Have you called him out for stealing money from a dead children’s charity?”

“Let’s not make it clear…”

“Your nationality is the country from which the land you were born on”

“Captain’s coming to fill be in on today’s shenanigans”

“My grandmother was the only survivor of Auschwitz”

“MMS is just table salt”

“Go on, ask me some questions. Let’s do a spitfire round”

“Rupert didn’t mean it when he threatened to come to England and kick down doors. It was a figure of speech”

“I am speechless and I am never speechless”

“Don’t trust anyone on YouTube – you can’t even pick them up to throw them”

“If you wanna hate and can’t say it with your chest, you’re just showing everyone how pathetic you are”

“Don’t forget, Nazis invaded Germany first”

“I pissed my sides laughing earlier today”

“God is calling out to you today to repaint your sins before it’s too late”

“You really should start a new paragraph after a full stop”

“Once they got you, they’re forever trapped in the balls of hell”

“Your not a smart person are you?”

“I’m the one who said what I said not you, you misunderstood what I said”

- fq (1)

“As the bible says, thou shall pay what they sawed”

“Until later, farewell”

“I accepted Jesus into my heat…”

“Awesome! When the choir joins in, James and the band take us to another lever”

“Can we pause for a second and think about the USA being the greatest country in the face of the universe?”

“Notice how they hide Hillary’s ties to the fake Russian collision scam”

“As they say, those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it”

“Terrible evil is in their mist”

- fq (2)

* * * * * * *

Literal Thinking

A literal collection of literal quotes from literal Kaley Umbrella:

“We’ve literally tiptoed into stupidity”

“There is literal legislation around it all now”

“Danny, AJ and Danny are all on there today. It’s literally a handful”

“You’re literally making dicks of yourselves”

“Wavy’s fucked off. He’s literally shat a brick”

“Football is stupid. It’s literally people taking their eye off the ball and kicking a dead bit of leather round a field into a net, which isn’t going to do much for our children”

“You’ve literally made my night”

“They are literally the most cuddable creatures”

“We’re literally screwed if we can’t get past this nonsense”

“He has been around the circuit for years and he has literally gone hammer and tong at me”

“It’s good to see that the usual suspects literally have learnt their lesson”

“You’ve literally destroyed yourselves”

“You’ve literally destroyed my faith in humanity”

“The World’s gone mad. Like, literally mad”

“Minx, you’re literally impossible”

“He literally dragged your name through the shit”

“You couldn’t make it up. It’s literally bloody hell”

“This pandemic has literally done what it says on the tin”

“I’m literally gonna try and imprint that on my brain”

“I said it once when I was 9 years old and I literally couldn’t sleep for two years coz I’d said it”

“I literally can’t take YouTube seriously any more”

“A McDonald’s is literally just full of shit”

“You are literally a nutcase, Wendy”

“I’m literally the banter queen”

“He’s literally being an arsehole”

“I literally can’t be racist… I’m literally connected to every race and religion on this planet”

“I’m literally letting this one run 24/7 until tomorrow”

“I literally can’t say words any more”

“They’re literally taking the piss out of us now”

“Islam is a separate ideology that’s literally trying to take over the World”

“I really must go now. I am literally starving hungry”

“People are just literally buying into the narrative”

“I will literally put my number in the chat”

“You’re literally replaying stuff of me”

“Listen to this lady – she’s literally put everything on the line”

“You’re just literally sat there, watching every move I make, every breath I take”

“You couldn’t make it up. You literally couldn’t make it up”

“You’ve just literally jumped into bed with all the people you wanted to bring down”

“Have you seen that all the chat is about me? It’s literally water off a duck’s back”

“Their entire life is literally there in boxes”

“Look at the amount of time they’ve invested in literally trying to drive me over the edge”

And here’s one from her closest ally Den: “You’re literally scraping the barrel”

* * * * * * *


“You should start using your brian”

“Best idea ever. Guard the boarders”

“We should be firing them North Korean rockers at the Russians”

“The DC courts saying Rudy can’t practice law for no reason doesn’t prove anything about rugby”

“You partisan, hatful abortion loving hacks”

“Amen. It’s common cents”

“I’m armed to the grills”

“No incorrect spelling Jim, just read it correcly!”

“How can a software magnet allow other countries to have a patient?”

“I didn’t expect someone of youre educational background to understand”

“Your all retarted”

“The biggest difference is Biden can’t compete an entire sentence”

“They’ve all been brianwashed”


List compiled by FMC

Please let us know of any worthy additions should you spot them  🙂


13 thoughts on “Fruitcake Quotes

  1. 😍 For one week only, Radio 1 DJ and non-fruitcake Jordan North makes an honorary appearance in ‘New Additions to the Fruitcake Quotes‘, for the following crackers:

    “I take my heart off to you”

    “…Denmark, which is up past Scotland…”

    More ‘New Additions’ here:


  2. Just added these recent ones from Angie, Kaley and other loons… 🙂

    “Rupert didn’t mean it when he threatened to come to England and kick down doors. It was a figure of speech”

    “I am speechless and I am never speechless”

    “Don’t trust anyone on YouTube – you can’t even pick them up to throw them”

    “If you wanna hate and can’t say it with your chest, you’re just showing everyone how pathetic you are”

    “Don’t forget, Nazis invaded Germany first”

    “I pissed my sides laughing earlier today”

    “Their entire life is literally there in boxes”

    “Look at the amount of time they’ve invested in literally trying to drive me over the edge”

    “God is calling out to you today to repaint your sins before it’s too late”


  3. New additions, 04.03.22 🙂

    “You really should start a new paragraph after a full stop”
    “Once they got you, they’re forever trapped in the balls of hell”
    “Your not a smart person are you?”
    “I’m the one who said what I said not you, you misunderstood what I said.”


  4. New additions, 11.04.22 🤭

    “As the bible says, thou shall pay what they sawed”
    “Until later, farewell”
    “I accepted Jesus into my heat…”
    “Awesome! When the choir joins in, James and the band take us to another lever”
    “Can we pause for a second and think about the USA being the greatest country in the face of the universe?”
    “Notice how they hide Hillary’s ties to the fake Russian collision scam”
    “As they say, those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it”
    “Terrible evil is in their mist”


  5. New additions, 19.05.22 🤭

    “You should start using your brian”
    “Best idea ever. Guard the boarders”
    “We should be firing them North Korean rockers at the Russians”
    “The DC courts saying Rudy can’t practice law for no reason doesn’t prove anything about rugby”
    “You partisan, hatful abortion loving hacks”
    “Amen. It’s common cents”
    “I’m armed to the grills”
    “No incorrect spelling Jim, just read it correcly!”
    “How can a software magnet allow other countries to have a patient?”
    “I didn’t expect someone of youre educational background to understand”
    “Your all retarted”
    “The biggest difference is Biden can’t compete an entire sentence”
    “They’ve all been brianwashed”


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