Death threats from a crackhead

Yesterday our friend Gabriella Barney spotted a couple of yobs mouthing off over on professional illiterate bully Alan Alanson‘s Facebook page.

Graham Watkeys and Matty Inglis Taylor were sharing their violent homo-erotic fantasies, as one does:And one of our team members remembered they’d seen Watkeys’ name somewhere before. Where could it have been?

Oh, yes! of course!Graham Watkeys had been drugs-tested after having stolen 5 memory cards from Sainsburys, and lo and behold, he turned up positive for heroin, cocaine, or crack cocaine. You’d never know it to look at him now, would you? Fine, upstanding lad that he is.

Interestingly, one of Graham’s aliases was given as ‘Andrew Eric Boustead’, who just so happens to be listed as his friend on Facebook: We’ve blacked out Mr Boustead’s photo, as it contains an image of a child; and who knows? Possibly Mr Watkeys only ‘borrowed’ his pal’s name to give to police. He meant to give it back afterward, but it slipped his mind.

Or something.