So much for Satanism.

Well, we have some very disappointing news for all those Hoaxtead-hawking conspiraloons who held out such high hopes that the Hampstead hoax would be The Big Case, the one that would prove that a secret cabal of élite blood-drinking, baby-sacrificing Satanists are really at the world’s helm.

Abe and Ella have now officially confirmed that this is no longer the case, so you might as well stand down.

But what happened to all those ‘masodomitic Babylonian Talmudic Satanic cults’? Sorry, they’re totes passé now. In an eye-watering three-hour marathon interview with an American ‘private investigator’ named Ed Opperman, Abe and Ella have revealed that the whole satanic gig is yesterday’s news.

No, the new Gospel According to Abrella is ‘state-sponsored trauma-based mind control’ (which we will abbreviate to SSTBMC in an effort to preserve everyone’s sanity). Here’s how they figured it out:

Abe: We couldn’t work out why [the police and the courts] were so blatantly perverting the course of justice—it didn’t make sense until we realised it was a state-sponsored trauma-based mind control project.

Ella: Satanic abuse is just a smokescreen for trauma-based mind control…

Abe: Trauma-based mind control operatives  always use satanic ritual abuse.

Oh. Well then. When you explain it that way, of course it makes perfect sense.

They talked about a lot of other stuff in the interview of course, but really, this was the message they wanted to get out.

Oh, and do you remember how we were talking a few days ago about why Abrella are even bothering to keep up this charade?

What, then, is the point of all this huffing and prancing and posturing?

From where we sit, it looks an awful lot like two things are happening:

1. As long as Abe/Drifloud keeps casting doubt upon the police investigation, he can keep the attention of the outer-fringe conspiraloons on Twitter and YouTube. They lap this stuff up, especially when it’s seasoned with a nice dash of Masonic and/or Jewish and/or Babylonian and/or Satanic paedophilia. That’s enough to keep the nutters hooked in almost indefinitely. And…

2. Abrella have lost and they know it, and so they’re determined to exact revenge on RD. A huge part of their ranting seems to focus on their hatred of him—because on some level, whether they admit it to themselves or not, they know they’ve come to the end of the road.

Looks like we weren’t too far off (except for the SSTBMC thing, of course).

Toward the end of the interview, Opperman asks them (repeatedly, because they keep taking evasive action) what they hope to achieve by continually putting out more information about the case. Would they consider a negotiated settlement if it meant that Ella could have her children back?

Erm….nope.

“We’re not going to be quiet,” Ella says. And Abe says, “Publicity is the soul of justice….This is why the information will run and run, because the information is already online”.

In other words, the children have become irrelevant.

What Abe and Ella want, what they’ve become addicted to, is attention. And they will do and say whatever they must to keep those page views coming.